No one can understand where a man loses his personality while creating the lives of others. (Photo: File)
“Men don’t cry, tears don’t look good in the eyes of boys, you are a man, be brave, be brave, don’t panic like that”.
Many such phrases are often heard in our society, where all aspects related to men’s feelings are limited.
It is said that our society gives more importance to men, but this is not 100% true. The mere birth of a child is celebrated, there are celebrations, sweets are distributed, but when it grows up, it experiences an antisocial attitude. All the responsibilities are placed on his shoulders very easily.
He is so caught up in employment, sister’s marriage expenses, dowry, sibling’s education and parents’ medicine expenses that his own youth begins to fade and he becomes an uncle instead of a boy. Boys have to leave home just like girls. They also go abroad to earn money. Living alone in a hostel, living as a bachelor, taking care of his own food and drinks and bearing all the expenses, missing his loved ones in a foreign country many miles away, all this happens to this boy.
The sisters-in-law come to Makkah and make a lot of noise, but when the brother comes back from abroad for a few days, the whole family, including the mothers and sisters, waits for his return.
He cannot even talk to his wife abroad. Most of the telephone calls are overheard by everyone except the wife and requests for various gifts are made. Even now, in many families, the husband is made to hate his wife so that he can continue earning there for the rest of his life and support his family. If this is not selfishness, what is it?
A man indulges his small needs and wants and buys gifts for his family. Many times, he is trapped in such spending cycles that even his ticket money is not collected, but the requests of relatives are never fulfilled like Amr Ayar’s basket. Why don’t men get the protocol that sisters get? If they sit next to the wife for two hours, the mother has a problem, if they sit next to the mother, the wife gets angry. After all, what should that poor man do, where should he go, where should he tell the state of his heart?
No one can understand where a man loses his personality while creating the lives of others. It is very painful. Then when this disaffected man finds his interests outside and falls prey to the wrong society, he is easily blamed for the whole situation.
We all know that man is the name of the world of emotions and feelings. Like women, men also have feelings and emotions. Just as the elderly, children and women all need to express their feelings, men too are not exempt from it. They also want to cry, they also want the company of someone sympathetic. When we don’t get a chance to reflect our feelings properly at home, our own self scolds us, then we start to think of the outside world as our total universe. No one tries to understand that boys and men also have problems and they are of a serious nature. It is important to let them cry too. It is also important to be their shield in times of trouble.
We also say that women need protection from men. But don’t men need emotional connection, sadness and compassion? If there are children, they are after money, wives making unnecessary demands, mothers and sisters, sons and brothers considering them as money machines. Men spend their whole lives in foreign countries and children say, what have you done for us? You are obligated to support us, you have not done us a favor by sending us money. What should a defeated man do in such a situation?
On the other hand, there are many wives who are the servant of the husband and the source of his affection. Children of many people who are equal to salt in flour are good and obedient and many mothers and sisters consider their sons and brothers as valuable assets. But my question still remains that why can’t a man finally cry?
Why are men shown as brave and powerful as giants in our stories, stories and books? Why is this human side not thought of as having feelings, he can also feel a situation, as a human his eyes can also be moist. Men are also a family unit. With it, injustice all the time is enough to scatter the shiraz of the society. We have to respect men as fathers, husbands, sons and brothers and also make them believe that they will not be ridiculed when tears come to their eyes in the future.
Note: Express News and its policy do not necessarily agree with the views of this blogger.
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