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Our colleague very rudely refused.”The host’s mouth dropped and he signaled the waiter to go back.”The atmosphere in the room became tense.” Could not be.
After a while our companion realized his mistake and shifted his side in his chair and said, “Aap chai ka kah hi dein.” The host’s face reddened a second time and he shook his head in denial. ‘Sarab aap rahe dain’ finish your talk and give me permission’ I have to go to the market’ what could be the conversation now in this atmosphere’ we quickly finished our talk and took permission from them’ the host got up and They came to drop us off at the door. As we started to leave, their servant came in, holding the box of sweets that we had brought for the host.
The host very lovingly and humbly gave us back our box and smiled and said “we don’t eat sweets” it will go to waste so you take it back” we felt bad but we got the box back” He stopped the car at a short distance and started repairing his friend. He did not realize his folly till then. What was there to be angry about? I stopped and took a deep breath ‘I felt this poor thing really had no fault’ We are a nation ignorant ‘uncivilized and disordered’ It took centuries for us to even learn normal everyday manners.
Before I proceed further let me tell you the background of this incident “We three friends went to a businessman’s house eight years ago to meet him” We hardly took time from him “We went to his drawing room. I sat down’ the host came’ met with great love and respect and he asked us ‘you guys would like tea’ coffee or green tea’ our friend who had taken time from them’ he “We won’t take anything” he said very rudely.
The host asked again. The friend’s reply was, “We have just finished drinking.” The host’s face fell and he sent the servant back. Does not meet the criteria of civility and courtesy’ Service or hospitality is the right of the host and a guest should not deprive his host of this right’ This is abuse’ When we go to someone’s house or office, the host Passes have three options ‘fill the table without asking us and feed the guest insistently’ it means the host gave us special importance.
She had informed her family before our arrival and they were busy cooking and decorating for us for five or six hours. Even if we are packed up to the aorta, we should taste and appreciate the food or high tea generously and say to the host, ‘Thank you baji, aunty or sister-in-law’ on our behalf. They took a lot of pain for us but this thing was very delicious and glorious and so on.
I am a person who eats very little, but in such a situation, ‘I also taste all the items little by little and appreciate them generously,’ an elderly friend of ours goes a few steps further. We used to ask for his “recipe” and sometimes told the host, “Please pack this stuff for me” I want to get my wife tested. His technique was very impressive.
He used to take home something from the table and later talk to his begum’s host’s wife. So it was a brilliant public relations technique ‘The host has another option, give you a choice’ I usually give the option of tea, coffee and green tea’ which means I have all three options. There are and I value the convenience of the guest’ many of us don’t like tea’ they drink coffee and many of us have given up tea coffee’ they drink green tea.
We should feel their compulsion and give them choice, so when the host feels you, the guest should not refuse it. Even if he doesn’t want to drink anything, he should say green tea. Water should not be asked anyway. ‘ Why? Because ninety-nine percent of households bring water with tea or food, we friends usually go a step further in this matter. are miles ahead of ‘They tell me before they come I will only drink coffee and I prepare coffee and sit down before their arrival.
Learning from them, I now tell the host wherever I go that I will only have green tea or tea and how long I will sit with the host. If there’s no work and I’m just going to chat, I also tell the host to relax and not have to repeatedly ask, “Any other order worthy of me?” The host who gives the choice should not disappoint us by refusing because he is feeling helpless, he does not want to force us to drink coffee or tea, and the third choice of the host is silence. Asking ‘Let’s come’, shake hands with us or say hello from afar and that’s it, it has two meanings.
The first means that the host does not have much time, he has to go somewhere or someone else has to come after us, so the host is short on time and wants us to talk about work and leave. It may be that there is no one in his house to make tea or coffee at that time or he is suffering from some domestic problem and he cannot serve us. .
Let me also tell you here that in this situation when the guest has finished his talk and the issue of the meeting is over and the host asks the guest for any other service worthy of me or you will not take tea or coffee, then it is ‘Not hosting’ means the host wants you to take permission now because he is busy whereas some of us take it as an offer and ask for tea or coffee and thus the host is trapped.
There is a tradition in offices all over the world ‘the guest is served tea and coffee before meeting the host’ you arrive ‘the waiter offers you tea’ coffee or green tea’ you take as desired and Later you have a meeting with Sahib’ it means Sahib has less time so you just talk about work and take leave and secondly if Sahib also asks you for tea and coffee then it means to give permission. Say thank you and go from there.
I come back to the incident ‘our host gave us a choice of tea’ coffee and green tea but my friend rudely refused’ the host felt bad and sent the servant back’ my friend when he realized his mistake When he realized this, he asked for tea and this was another insult to the host, but he flatly refused and returned our sweet while leaving.
My two friends felt bad, but I told them, “This person is our benefactor. If he had swallowed his pain, listened to us, smiled and sent us back, we would never have learned such a great lesson in life.” Sacrificing his image gave us a lesson in life that we will never forget so go back’ meet him again and thank him’ my friends agreed with me ‘we went back’ the host’s doors But knocked,’ he came out in a state of distress. “We also laughed and hugged him” That man is still our best friend and we fondly call him Mithai Bhaijaan.
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